People often ask about what the challenges are of being an adoptive Mama. I cant lie, there are many..it is not for the faint of heart. The good news, I look at myself before I adopted my first child, and am glad I am no longer that person. Somehow those challenging moments change us. I remember sitting in Childrens Hospital with my newly adopted son and having them tell me that he had special needs. I thought my world had ended. I cried all the way home. I laugh now.. special needs- we've got that down!
I think one of the most difficult Mama moments is hearing of all the horrible things that happened to your child before you were there. Thinking if only I had rescued them sooner, I could have saved them from this pain. And, then the emotional journey of walking them through the healing. I believe complete emotional healing is possible through God, but it is not instant!
That's been our week, dealing with some pain of the past, hurting for the wounded, and then seeking God's healing. I've had to rely on the strength that only God gives, and yes, one night I laid in my bed and cried, telling God I am not sure I have what it takes. I hurt when they hurt. I tell them to forgive those to have done this to them, but struggle with wanting to go Mama Bear on someone! Yes, we live in a world where people do horrific things to small children, it's hard to hear, but when they become your children, its even harder to hear. Thats when we have to lean on a God who is stronger than us. As an adoptive Mama there are many " leaning" moments. In those moments God reminds me how much stronger I am as a woman, then I was before. I am glad I am not the uptight Mom I was before adoption was a part of our lives. Those challenges make us stronger!
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